Alright, so I’ve lived in the city for about two weeks now, and of course that obviously does not make me an expert on city living at all. But it does mean that I’ve spent a bit of time here now and I’ve noticed a few things. I would like to share those things with you
1. I am lock inept.
Fine, this is more of a new apartment thing than a city thing, but I suck at opening my apartment door. The key does not turn easily, and I have to jiggle it around in there to get it to unlock. I don’t know if this is a lock thing or a me thing, but I’m going to go with the latter. I probably just suck.
I know, Linnie.
I am used to just using my garage door keypad to get in my house, which has left me not very key savvy. I’ve kind of always struggled with keys, to be honest. It is very embarrassing when I am struggling to open my door for five minutes and someone is waiting for the elevator beside me. I absolutely look like a tool. So usually I pretend to search for something in my bag until they leave so as to not look like a total idiot who doesn’t know how to open a door. It’s been working out so far.
2. Random people on the street will sometimes be very angry for no reason.
I kind of already knew this. Back in April I was meeting a friend downtown and I was walking by myself, and a homeless woman was walking toward me. I smiled at her, but I guess my smile can also be translated to “I hate you” because she screamed “Yerrrrrrrrrr UGLY!” at me. She then continued her random rant with “Ya stupid blonde B*TCH!” and proceeded to lunge towards me.
Two men had to grab her from either side and drag her away from me. I thought she might actually punch me in the face. She was not a nice woman, I will just say.
And a few nights ago I was with my friends Hannah and Lisa, and we were walking along the sidewalk. We were apparently on the wrong side of the sidewalk, and this angry, angry man came out of nowhere and yelled “GIT over there!” at us, while grabbing Lisa by the shoulders and shoving her to the other side.
I thought he was joking, so I may have laughed kind of in his face… But no no, he was not. He then called us basically every swear word possible before waddling away all angrily.
I truly didn’t know there was a right side to the sidewalk. I notice that most people just walk in the middle of it anyway. Perhaps I shall start yelling at them. Seriously, what does screaming at a stranger accomplish besides making yourself look like an idiot? I don’t understand how people can be so angry. It’s so unnecessary. They’re going to give themselves a heart attack with all their anger.
Chef Ramsay, I am looking directly at you when I say that.
3. I now walk everywhere.
Speaking of walking, I have been walking everywhere! It’s so easy to get to places. When I lived in the ‘burbs, I would rountinely drive to the store around the corner from my house, which was probably faster to walk to with the shortcut. Lazypants. But now I will walk a kilometre and a half to go to the drugstore, or to pick up food.
This is mainly because driving in the city is busy and annoying, and parking is not fun at all. But hey, walking is good.
4. If I do drive, I pick the wrong time and the wrong street.
When I do decide to drive instead of walking or taking transit, apparently I pick the worst time ever and the busiest street. I drove down St. Clair yesterday after Italy won, and it was a bad idea. Impromptu street parties everywhere, and everyone was screaming, and all I could hear was constant horn honking.
When I am driving, horn honking causes me instant anxiety. I immediately assume the person is honking at me and I am about to hit someone or I missed an advanced green or something (although I never miss an advanced green, I LIVE for advanced greens).
Also, everyone had flags.
I think I may have been the only person who did not have a flag.
Thanks a lot for winning, Italy. Worst traffic of my life. It was okay though, it was funny to watch.
5. Subway > Buses
Even though I had a bad experience on the subway, I still looove the subway. People-watching on the subway may be my new favourite thing. Plus it’s on a track, and I know the route, so I can’t get lost.
But buses…I am not a fan of buses. I fear I will get lost.
It’s an irrational fear of getting lost, for sure. But I am afraid I’m going to get on the wrong bus and end up in the middle of nowhere, and then the bus will leave and I won’t be able to get home. I’ve felt like this my entire life, and have actually had nightmares about it.
It is my mission this summer to get over my bus fear.
Well, that is it for now, but it’s only been two weeks, so I’m sure I’ll be learning a lot more! But not today my good friends, I am currently on a plane out west for 10 days of mountain and Calgary Stampede adventures! Gird your loins for a ton of scenic and beautiful pictures!
And maybe pictures of cowboys too.